Swiss-American psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1926-2004), a pioneer in near-death studies, shared her theory and popularized the idea of the five stages of grief, also known as the “Kübler-Ross model” in her internationally best-selling book, “On Death and Dying”.
Not everyone experiences grief in a linear or predictable way, and these stages might not apply to everyone. People may move back and forth between stages or experience them in a different order. I hope however they are of some use to the reader here.
The stages of grief, as proposed by Kübler-Ross, are:
1. Denial: In this stage, individuals may have difficulty accepting the reality of the loss. They might feel shock, numbness, and disbelief, creating a protective barrier against the overwhelming emotions.
2. Anger: As the denial stage begins to fade, the pain of the loss becomes more apparent. People may feel frustrated, irritable, and resentful. They might direct their anger at themselves, others, or even the person they’ve lost.
3. Bargaining: In an attempt to regain control or make sense of the situation, people might bargain with a higher power or try to negotiate to reverse or change the outcome. This stage can involve “if only” and “what if” statements.
4. Depression: As the reality of the loss fully sets in, individuals may experience profound sadness, despair, and a sense of emptiness. They might withdraw from others, lose interest in activities, and struggle with feelings of hopelessness.
5. Acceptance: This stage doesn’t necessarily mean complete happiness or moving on, but rather a gradual understanding and acceptance of the new reality. People start to find ways to live with the loss and may feel a sense of peace or resolution.
Since then, further work has been done by experts to study the grieving process. Much has been researched and documented.
It’s crucial to emphasize that these stages are not a one-size-fits-all framework for grief. Different people experience grief in different ways, and not everyone goes through all of these stages or experiences them in the same order. Additionally, cultural, personal, and situational factors can greatly influence how an individual experiences and processes grief.
If you or someone you know is struggling with grief, it’s recommended to seek support from friends, family, support groups, therapists, or counselors who can provide the appropriate guidance and assistance during this challenging time.